What To Do When You Don’t Want To Care For Your Elderly Parents

care for your elderly parents
care for your elderly parents

Care is at the core of every family. What makes family bonds strong is the presence of care, and in most cases, it comes unconditionally. Similarly, the social and cultural wiring we all are born with encourages caring for our parents. Just as they cared for us since we were born and lost many sleepless nights for us, we are expected to do the same for them. However, sometimes, this concept can be quite burdensome for people.

Those who did not grow up with healthy and cordial bonds with their parents often have a hard time adjusting to this responsibility. This type of expectation requires a lot, not just from the parents but also from the caregivers.

Moreover, the constant care, attention, and assistance that aging parents require can be very draining. Nowadays, people are running out of time. Everyone is on a strict schedule and fitting the care needed for an aging parent can seem very troublesome and inconvenient.

Questions to consider why you don’t want to care for your elderly parents:

  • Are you burnt out? Are the work stress and the stress from personal life getting too much to handle lately?
  • Is there something triggering this need for isolation from a parent?
  • Do you have sufficient finances to take care of your parent and yourself?
  • Are you emotionally in the right headspace to handle an emotionally dependent parent?


1. Figure out exactly what your parent needs 

Once you answer these questions, things would start to be clearer. However, if regardless you find yourself hesitating to take this step you must consider the following steps

  • Meal preparation
  • Their routine checkups
  • Social interactions
  • Mobility


2. Consider medical facilities or other relevant care options

  • In-home caregiving help: There are a wide variety of medical health facilities and governmental plans that do not require the parent to leave their homes hence that would be a comfortable option.
  • Facilities that feel like home: Take advantage of services that entail specialized meal prep, timely medical routines aligned for your parent and helping them with social interactions.


3. Share the Load

If you feel overwhelmed, you might want to assign the caretaking responsibilities to a trusted friend, a sibling, or a relative. By sharing the load, you might clear your head and start fresh.



These steps would help you to make the right decision if you find yourself not wanting to take care of elderly parents.